Matt's Story

This collection of memories is written by Mom

Birth

It was a beautiful day when a beautiful child was born on July 14, 1989. This day was the happiest, proudest, heart-warming, and absolutely thrilling time of our lives.  Our joy was mixed with uncertainty and fear because Matthew had been born premature and, with that, possible complications. He wasn’t due to come into the world till September 3, but he wasn’t waiting around.  Being a preemie, he was 4 pounds, 4 ounces and his weight dropped to 3 pounds, 16 ounces a day after his birth but he was a fighter and was determined to stay. It was anticipated that he would have to stay in hospital for as long as two months, but he came home with us in three weeks.  The doctors and nurses advised us that preemies are sometimes prone to sickness. However, this wasn't the case with Matthew. We could only remember Matthew having an occasional cold or ear infection. He was our miracle, our pride and joy and the love of our life.  A love like I never felt before and never will again.  Our bundle of joy with those big blue eyes and blonde hair was now our world and much more.  Words alone cannot describe the love we felt for our new son Matthew Rodney Churchill.

Toddler

As a toddler, we had daily visits to the park. His first word was park after speaking the words every parent loves to hear - Mom and Dad.  During our park visits, the first stop was to feed the ducks and then on to the swings.  He loved it when Poppy Brett would stand in front of him while on the swing and Matthew would try to hit his Poppy’s bum with his feet.  Of course Poppy Brett would say, “Who kicked my bum?” and Matthew’s laugh would warm and fill your heart every time.  As Matthew got a little older, the park was our stop with his bike.  This is where Mom and Dad would get their workout trying to keep up with Matthew in the park, his freeway. Matthew's first teddy bear was Joe Joe, a panda bear. Joe Joe went everywhere - drives, sleepovers and vacations.  He was a must in Matthew's luggage, where clothes was often left behind to make room for Joe Joe.  Joe Joe now sleeps on Matthew's pillow alone.

Preschool

Because I was a working Mom, Matthew stayed with his Nanny Bernice during the daytime from ages 1 to 4.  Of course, we couldn’t ask, or want for a better person to look after Matthew.  Matthew was her pride and joy.  Their time was spent playing, reading books and reading even more books.  Our evenings were filled with the joy of just listening to him talk about his day with his Nanny and of course reading more books and story telling.  Matthew had so many books I’m sure it would have made a library jealous.  At the age of 4, we enrolled Matthew in preschool to prepare him for, as he would say, Big School.  We were not sure who found this harder – Nanny Bernice or us but in a few days, all was ok. When Poppy Alf wasn’t working, there was always a trip into Poppy Alf’s garden to tend to the potatoes and to feed the horse.  We wonder who was more proud sitting in that pick-up truck - Poppy Alf or Matthew. As a family we enjoyed many summer drives. Matthew would always make sure he had a pillow, blanket and his teddy bear Joe-Joe before any outing.  Every Christmas Eve it was our tradition to go to a movie to see a Christmas movie, we started this when Matthew was young.  Now the thoughts of our first Christmas without Matthew this year is an excruciating thought and something I can’t bring myself to think about.

Pre-Teen and Teen

All of our times were so precious and we are so thankful for them.  We spent so much time together as a family. There were no times that school plays and concerts were missed – as a family we attended them all. Our summers were filled with activities from little excursions to Sandy Cove to go paddle boating and walk on the beach or visits to the Museum and the Geo-Center.  Winters were great, especially on a snow day when Matthew and myself would stay in our PJ’s all day.  Matthew would listen to the radio every morning during the winter just waiting for the announcement “No School Today”! We would watch movies, talk or go baking. Every night before bed he'd lay at the foot of my bed, requesting his foot massage or his back scratched. During this time we'd chat about school, girls, friends, or whatever was on his mind or mine. These times were such a pleasure to spend with Matthew. I loved each and every minute.  Matthew had a typical teenage appetite for the amounts consumed, however, I don't think it was typical of what most teens crave.  Matthew enjoyed rabbit stew, moose sausages, and other Newfoundland dishes, but it was the concoctions that he ate like his salmon sandwiches (salmon on a bun with mustard, pickles and butterscotch pudding) or potato chips in his homemade dip (mayo and salsa but if there was no salsa it was ketchup). Watching Matthew eat supper was always an adventure because we never knew what flavor enhancements, and combinations of, would be added to his plate. Boiled cabbage with vinegar, cookies dipped in Pepsi and ketchup over everything was some of his other specialties.

School Days

Matthew liked/loved school from kindergarten to his last days.  In his entire school life, I’m sure there was only a week missed in total.  This is where his friends were - why be anywhere else.  Matthew loved his friends and to be social.  He was a real chatterbox from Kindergarten to grade nine.  One comment from his grade seven teacher was that Matthew was being so chatty that she had to move him to the front of class where he sat next to a girl who never spoke. By the end of class this girl who never spoke was now talking thanks to Matthew. This girl who had no friends, was now a new friend to many. Matthew admired and enjoyed most of his teachers.  Matthew's kindergarten teacher, of course was fun, she would call Matthew, "Rodney", because she had his dad, Rod, as a student when he was in kindergarten. Matthew would come home laughing saying, "Dad, Ms. Crocker called me you again".  Mr. Fennemore was Matthew's grade six teacher and this was Matthew's first male teacher - and therefore so cool. Mr. Fennemore is a family friend, so Matthew would love to call him by his first name in class and say "excuse me Rick" giggle, giggle I mean "Mr. Fennemore". Mr. Clancey was Matthew's grade seven Social Studies teacher who was also a hockey player.  This was an important trait in a teacher for Matthew! Ms. Luby was Matthew's grade nine English teacher and she was the "with-it" teacher and in Matthew's own words, "Mom, she knows how to relate to us - she's the best". Ms. Gallagher was gentle and soft, she was Matthew's Math teacher. Matthew found math hard and struggled with it, but Matthew said "She explains stuff so well that I can understand it".  Ms. Adams was Matthew's grade seven and eight English teacher.  She was exceptionally interesting to Matthew.  He loved her stories about where she grow up in the US and many more stories.  He'd come home and tell us all her stories.  He learned so much from her. These are some of the teachers who had a great impact on Matthew's life, made school interesting and were motivating to him. Matthew did very well academically in school even with a learning disability. We believe the only set back of being a preemie was a learning disability called written output disorder.  The doctor’s described it to us as knowing what you want to say but having difficulty writing down your thoughts. However, this didn’t stop Matthew from performing well in school.  With his positive attitude and hard work, along with us his every step of the way, his grades were impressive.  Matthew worked hard for every mark he received in school.  He studied and did homework assignments every night with us from Kindergarten to grade 9. He seldom complained to us about all the work he was putting into his studies and education because, at any early age, he knew how important education would be for his future.  Actually in early March, Rod and myself had a meeting with Ms. George, the Guidance Councilor at Leary’s Brook to go over the course outline for grade 10. We were there to ensure Matthew would have no trouble pursuing University studies with the courses that were selected.  Matthew talked about being a Police Officer or a Geologist like his Dad, he also liked the idea of being a Chef.

Friends

Matthew had so many friends it was incredible.  We have known most of them from pre-school age to now, as young adults.  These young adults are amazing and true friends not only to Matthew but to us as well.  Matthew's closest buddies were Gregory Thorne and Jason Duggan, they were more like brothers than friends.  You wouldn't see one without the other.  Many hours were spent, just the three of them, watching the St. John's Maple Leafs games at Mile One.  In addition to his "brotherly" friends, were close friends Morgan Chaulk, Ryan Mitchell, Ben Blackmore, Andrew Carter, Susan Barney, Steven Jones, Rebecca Ginn, Justin Tucker, Chris Amminson, Brendan Guy, Will Johnstone, Kayla Snow, and many many more. These buddies did everything from going to movies, chat on the phone, chat on MSN, lunch buddies, having a game of "hack", playing hockey, jamming with their guitars, going to Cozy's take-out for Poutine, skating, or going to each others homes - usually at Susan's on Friday nights. Every spring and summer our house was the hang-out for hundreds of games of spotlight with his close friends and neighbor friends. Parents used to say, “Your garden is going to be destroyed”, my reply was “Its only grass…it doesn’t matter”, “I know where Matthew is, and he and his friends are safe here”.  Oh, how we will miss the sound of running feet this summer. Friday nights were our take-out nights. On the way home I'd call Matt to see who was with him.  If Jason was with Matthew it was Big Mac Meals, and just ketchup on Jason's Mac.  If it was Greg, it was pizza night with just cheese and pepperoni. 

Family

On the Churchill side of the family, there is Matthew's Aunt Lynette, or Aunt Ninney as he called her.  They were more like brother and sister than an aunt and nephew.  They were extremely close and loved each other dearly.  Aunt Ninney was thirteen when Matthew arrived. Matthew was her shadow and she was the big sister, the protector. But of course there was the occasional fight, "I'm sitting in the front seat of the car", "no I'm sitting in the front", "no you sat there the last time" and you knew who would usually win. We lived with Nanny Bernice, Poppy Alf and Aunt Ninney for the first six years of Matthew's life while Rod was going to University and finishing his Masters degree in Geology. Aunt Ninney lives just up the road with Uncle Shawn - not too far from us - just where Matthew always wanted her - close by. Uncle Shawn is the guy with the cool black car, the car Matthew wanted to buy because they don't make them anymore.  Aunt Wanda lives in Sherwood Park, Alberta - where Aunt Wanda is a Nurse - with Uncle Garry and two cousins Adrianna and Devan.  When Adrianna and Devan moved away in 2001, a piece of Matthew's heart left when they did, he missed them terribly.  Matthew's great-grandmother Daisy Churchill loved Matthew dearly.  He was her first great grandchild.  She passed away when Matthew was ten. Great-grandmother Lillian Miller, or as Matthew called her "Nanny in the woods", loved to see Matthew coming for his many trips to visit.  She lived next door when Matthew was small, so he was usually the messenger between Nanny Bernice's and Nanny in the woods.  Nanny in the woods would put a note in a little plastic baggie and safety pin it to his shirt. She passed away in 2003 - we had said that if she was still alive while when this happened to Matthew, we're sure this would have ended her's. Great-grandfather Gordon Miller, or "Super Pop", Matthew didn't like the "great" word before grandfather. Super Pop died Sept 11, 2001.  When he passed away, Matthew said he went up to help all the people who died in New York in the Twin Towers. Matthew never met his great-grandfather Levi Churchill but we are sure that Matthew would have been the apple of his eye. His grandparents Nanny Bernice and Poppy Alf cherished Matthew with all their heart and soul.  Matthew always wanted Nanny Bernice to open a store to sell her turkey dinners - especially her dressing.  Nobody could cook like Nan. Matthew's farm life was spent with Poppy Alf in the gardens, helping with the hay, feeding the horse, and driving with Pop on the tractor. They struggle every day with the loss of Matthew.

On the Pugh side of the family there is Aunt Daina with Uncle Ron and cousins Adam, Jake and Thomas who live in Paradise. Adam, Jake and Thomas just loved the ground Matthew walked on, he was so cool. Adam will also cherish the many games of driveway hockey with big cousin Matt. Before Aunt Daina and Uncle Ron had children of their own they spent time with Matthew. I'm sure Matthew was an influence on them deciding to have children.  Uncle Dann with Aunt Nancy and cousin Meaghan live in Bonavista - where Aunt Nancy is a teacher.  Uncle Dann is the cool electronic gadget uncle who loved to play Sony Playstation games with Matthew.  Meaghan, who is two, always loved to smile and look up and touch Matthew's face. Matthew did not get to meet his great-grandparents Desma and Brett Pugh (I'm named after my grandmother Desma) or Edith and Reg Moulton. They would have cherished him dearly. I know they are together now. Matthew's grandfather, Poppy Brett, treasured Matthew with all his heart and soul.   Matthew had so much fun with Poppy Brett, where they often went to the park, played golf, went to movies, or out to lunch. Poppy Brett was many times Matthew's personal driver. When Matthew was younger, and his Dad was in Labrador working, myself and Matthew would spend the summers staying at Poppy Brett in St. Johns'. He struggles every day without Matthew - he is forever in his thoughts. Matthew's Nanny Helen died before he was born. She died March 5, 1984.  We know that on March 28 they met for the first time and are now together holding one another.  They are true angels above.

The extended Pugh and Churchill families are many, with great aunts and uncles, great-great aunts and uncles and numerous cousins. Matthew had so many people that loved, cared and thought about him deeply. 

Gentle and Compassionate Personality

Matthew displayed kindness, gentleness and compassion as could be seen from saving his recyclables to buy gifts for the Happy Tree, wanting to donate his money to the Red Cross after the recent tsunami, or giving his money to friends to get them into a movie - just being a buddy. He cared deeply for others. He would share his lunch with friends at school who didn’t bring a lunch.  In grade two everyday for about three months we would have to make sure that Matthew had two oranges in his lunch - as he requested. One day Matthew came home and said "you can stop putting oranges in my lunch now...Jade is getting sick of them" - we thought that Matthew was eating the two everyday.  Over the years during school we bought more pencils and mittens because Matthew would give them away - he came home many times with cold hands but a warm heart knowing another friends hands were warm with his mittens on. He worried about his Nanny Bernice being at home alone while Poppy Alf was away working and would call her on the phone many times a night to check on her.  He almost fainted at the hospital when he saw his Poppy Brett in so much pain after knee surgery.  All of these things showed his compassionate nature. His cousins Adam, Jake, Thomas, Meaghan, Adrianna and Devan are younger, and thought there was no better person on earth than Matthew - he was just simply the best in their eyes. In February 2005, he had written a letter to Premier Williams and the Eastern School District, to voice his concerns regarding the overcrowding at Leary’s Brook Junior High. A parent just recently told me that when her son and family moved here from away last year, her son was nervous of not having any friends. She said that Matthew was the first person to approach her son and make him his friend, and because of Matthew’s friendship the son had made many friendships with Matthew’s other friends. We seldom heard Matthew complain about anything.  Actually the only thing Matthew complained about was a desire to own a motorcycle. But as his parents, providers and protectors, this was an absolute no way, forget about it topic.  These machines are dangerous and our child wouldn’t own one. He knew how we felt but would still ask on an almost weekly basis in hopes we had a change of heart. “Just asking” he would say.

In our family and circle of friends, we have a saying that Matthew said from a very young age, when he was feeling sad. He first said it after watching a sad show. He said Mom, “I feel sad in my throat” referring to the lump in your throat when you are sad and ready to cry.  So our saying when we are sad is always “I feel sad in my throat”. Today, both of us are sad in our throats and we will be like that for a lifetime.

Sports

Matthew was a high-energy child who loved life and what life had to give.  Matthew’s energy was taken up with his love of sports.  He loved swimming and swam like a fish - under the water more than on top. We first started Matthew in swimming lessons at the age of two.  We didn’t want Matthew to have a fear of the water and we wanted him to be a good swimmer. He had completed the Bronze Medallion and Senior Resuscitation Certifications from the Lifesaving Society for Lifeguarding.  He became involved in Tae-Kwon-Do at an early age.  His favorite part of this sport was breaking the boards with his feet.  In Tae-Kwon-Do, he had completed up to High Brown level and only had two more levels to complete for his Black Belt.  Matthew was also a part of the Portugal Cove-St. Philip's Minor Softball team for two years. The sport Matthew had his greatest passion for was Hockey.  He loved the sport, loved the friendships from it, the workout, and most of all being with his Dad at the rink.  During his hockey life, Matthew’s teams were awarded the gold medal in the Atom B House League Championships during the 2000-2001 season.  In his 2003-2004 Bantam season, Matthew’s team were awarded the Bronze medal.  During the 2004 Bantam “C” Provincial Championships, he received the Neil Maynard Award for most dedicated player.  Matthew loved the game for the fun of it and not the wins. There were times Matthew would get off the ice and not even know the score or who had won - just as long as he had fun. Another sport Matthew enjoyed was golf. At the age of eight, Poppy Brett gave Matthew his first golf club set and bag. He enjoyed taking lessons and couldn’t wait to start them - getting balls into position before the instructor would arrive.  Matthew was most proud of the sports he was able to do with his friends like the flying squirrel on his snowboard or performing ollies on his skateboard.

Music

Another important part of Matthew’s life was music.  Matthew loved all types of music.  For many years Matthew, Poppy Brett and myself would attend the Barbershop Chorus but Dad just couldn’t stomach to go – something that Matthew found quite funny.  As Matthew became older, we had thought that he would be embarrassed to go but he still chose and wanted to attend and always enjoyed it. Matthew and myself went to many productions at the Arts and Culture Center and saw The Wizard of Oz, Scrooge, Festival of Voices and many more.  Matthew took an interest in two instruments, the drums and guitar.  He was about nine when he owned his first set of drums (thanks a lot Poppy Brett!!) and had taken drum lessons from Paul Murphy.  His face would light up when he would see Paul play the drums. However, Matthew’s pride and joy was his new guitar that he got last Christmas, a six string lead guitar – a Gibson Epiphone.  He learned how to play the guitar by ear, jamming and talking guitar talk with friends such as Ryan and Will. After listening to any song a couple of times, he could start to play it on his guitar.  We spent many evening listening to the opening chorus of Metallica’s Enter Sandman and Seek & Destroy.  I think both of us could probably pick-up Matt’s guitar now and play these two songs since we heard so many times. Matthew made many trips to Music Stop on Kenmount Road during his lunch hour to chat with Rick Lambe whom Matthew thought was the coolest.  Ironically, the last song Matthew learned to play was Tears in Heaven by Eric Clapton – who wrote this song as a dedication to his son who died at a young age.  This song was played at both his funeral and the Leary’s Brook Memorial Service.

Of course as a mom, I could write a book about my child. The above are just some things that we did together and shared in our lives together.  Thank-you for reading and learning about Matthew.

Matthew our precious son you will always be

our world, our love, our thoughts

Mom’s baby and Dad’s bud.